soodonym

Every now and then life will hand you a lemon. And you just gotta go and make lemonade. Well…I’m not a chemist or anything but I do know that you need lemons(remember life always hands you plenty of these), water (which is always plentiful), and sugar. I guess the hard part is sugar. Sugar comes in many forms…brown, fake, cane, white, etc. Figuratively, for me sugar is a positive attitude and doing the best that one can do. I don’t think that you can really go wrong with that formula…no matter the situation.

So, what happens when despite your best efforts(sugar) you still don’t succeed? Do you still keep trying to make that lemonade? When do you call it quits and say enough is enough? I remember one time when I was in junior high. We always had to run “the mile” once a week. This day was dreaded by all the kids in the class…especially me. Granted I was an active child, I couldn’t run a decent mile for the life of me. The reason is because I used to get severe asthma attacks while running. Now, being the perfectionist that I was(at the time) I became determined to beat this thing. I wouldn’t have it ruling my life. So, I began by trying to improve my stamina and running techniques. This paid off initially, and got my mile time below 15 min., but it wasn’t good enough. So I added another weapon to my arsenal…the inhaler. Hahaha….I looked like a bonafide weakling carrying that thing around. But I didn’t care because my asthma could now be fought on the field. This shaved a few precious minutes off my time. Bringing my time to the admirable 8 minute range. Now, this was a good time, but not great. I still needed to get below 7 minutes if I wanted an “A”. Well….one day I was determined. I ran that mile. I pushed myself. I punished myself. I killed myself for it. At the end I walked away with a 6 minutes 58 second mile time. Afterwards, I couldn’t catch my breath for over three hours…that hurt…physically. Nonetheless, I kept trying in the weeks to come….I kept killing myself. For some reason I could never feel good afterwards. It was always something that I had to do unnaturally…even after building my endurance to the best of my ability(at the time). After a while I gave up…it was far too physically painful. I was miserable for half the day…couldn’t breathe. I guess in this situation I tried to make lemonade…and it ended up tasting very sour(despite all that sugar).

I guess sometimes even though you want something so bad you’re willing to kill yourself for it…sometimes, for the sake of your own well being, you have to walk away(and save that sugar for another time). But then what happens when you still want it after you’ve walked away? I suppose you have to be content with your decision. And rationalize not wanting that special something because the pain will outweigh the benefits.

Recently my apartment has been plagued by ants. These critters are fascinating…I look at their intensity and I think cockroach. If there was an apocalyptic event I think that cockroaches would definitely be alive and ants would be a close second. No matter what you do…they are persistent and in the end they usually get their way. They get into EVERYTHING…trash cans(take it out), the pantry(make sure the sugar lid is on tight), the sink(wash those dishes), and surprisingly the fridge(???). Here is my story:

So, my roomate and I decided on a passive method at first in dealing with them. That meant washing the dishes immediately, wiping the countertops constantly, and never throwing away anything in the trashcan. And this worked for the most part…through several weeks we all lived in an eco-friendly harmony. We also had a pretty clean kitchen to boot. Although occasionally we would get a little lazy and put small garbage items into small bags and store them in the freezer(nothing else in the freezer but vodka anyways). That way the ants wouldn’t be able to get into the freezer and we wouldn’t have to make 9000 trips down to the dumspter. However, this was all about to change.

Our bretheren were obviously perturbed. We weren’t feeding them enough. So, they took it upon themselves on behalf of the colony and their queen to stage a coup and take control of the situation. I awoke one morning earlier this week to find that the kitchen had been compromised. They were everywhere…and most importantly they were attacking the fridge with impunity. I wondered if they were actually making it inside of the fridge…thinking that their tiny little bodies couldn’t possibly fight the “old man winter” that lives in my fridge. Well I was half right. My little friends were able to break through the airtight seal and get inside the fridge. But once they entered they basically would just die. But that didn’t stop them from wanting what was inside. They just kept trying. I can’t imagine how they would even guess to go into the fridge. I’m sure ants aren’t born with the innate knowledge that all fridges contain food. But enough of my shock. Later that evening we decided to fight back with various houshold items. We still did not wish to kill our bretheren…but we didn’t like the way they were mistreating our fridge.

We tried blowing them away with a can of air(the kind you use to clean your computer parts). We tried wiping down the area with vinegar(hoping their scent trails would be destroyed). We tried sprinkling chili pepper around the fridge(hoping the chili spices would interfere with their trails). We even tried cologne(cuz if you put too much on it keeps ladies away and we were hoping the cologne scent would be stronger than their ant-trail-scent). Out of all of these items can you guess which one worked the best? The cologne. So we sprayed up a storm in the kitchen. Pretty soon the place smelled of “Cerruti Image”…and a lot of it. We had once more gained control of the fridge. But it wasn’t meant to last.

The following morning they had reclaimed the fridge. We responded with our new biological weapon…the Cerutti. Then in the evening they reclaimed the fridge once more. I swear it’s like Alsace-Lorraine the territory went back and forth between us. We were running out of options and so we decided to try something that we had heard of on the internet. Baby powder. We sprinkled it all over the kitchen…countertops, around the fridge, pantry, trashcan. We even sprinkled it all over their ranks. And you know what…IT WORKS!! I’ve never seen ants run away like that. They were gone in a matter of around 5 – 10 minutes. Their numbers thinned to only a few who were just scampering around not really knowing where to go.

I have no idea where they all went, but at least we didn’t kill them AND we got our kitchen back.

Well, I finally got up off my ass and installed wordpress. The sad thing is that it wasn’t very difficult and I feel bad that I didn’t do it earlier. In any case, since this is my premier post. I’d like to give a mighty “Hello World” to everyone.

¡Hola Mundo!

So, what happens now? I guess, we’ll find out. I’m not sure what to expect at all. This is my first personal ‘website’ adventure and I guess in time this site will gain a personality in and of itself. Will that be MY personality? Who knows…perhaps that is why the address is “soodonym” (pronounced pseudonym).

Over the next few weeks…I’ll be working on the look and feel of the site. So, if its broken that’s a good thing since it means I’m actually working on it. Oh and last but definitely not least…the first post wouldn’t be complete without saying thanks to Nabby and all who encouraged me to make a website.